Jesus Hell, the Sixties were awesome

the follwing contains excessive use of the word "awesome"


So, I am continually compiling a sixties playlist. It reminds me of driving around in the summer time with my mom, plus, fucking duh, the sixties were the most badass moment in music ever. This quest for the perfect, all-inclusive playlist usually starts with me downloading one specific song by an artist, then going back and looking for other titles by said artist. That always ends with me finding about six TOTAL JOY INDUCING awesome hits and exclaiming with glee, "JESUS HELL, THE SIXTIES WERE AWESOME."

Seriously, how did so many bands write so many ridiculously spectacular songs?! For bands whose songs are in every movie, commercial, etc, why are people not as obsessed with them I am?! Get with the program!!! Fuck Hendrix or the Beatles or whoever it is you're name dropping all the time.

First off, let's talk about Three Dog Night. TELL ME you don't squeal with delight when you hear "Jeremiah was a bullfrog..." being belted out of your radio. Or
"One (is the loneliest number)". That piano lick is classic! Or "Mama Told Me not to Come"? Words of wisdom if I ever heard them. Go download "Shambala" and "Never Been to Spain." If they don't ring a bell you'll know them when you hear them. Any one of these songs would've singlehandledly been a feat of rock genius, all of them together is enough awesome to last me forever.

The Turtles. "Happy Together" is probably the standout hit for my generation thanks to a way overplayed Golden Grahams commercial in the 80's, but my favorites are their slower, vaguely creepy hits like "Elenore" and "You Showed Me" which feature some pretty sweet experimental synths and rather strange harmonies. "Elenore" in particular has some of the kookiest lyrics ever like the exuberant chorus, "Gee, I think you're swell, you're my pride and joy, et cetera." Dude, anyone who can write the nerdtastic words gee, swell, and et cetera into a cool song is a musical force to be reckoned with. Not to mention the rhyming poetry of the lines "your looks intoxicate me/ even though your folks hate me" and "they'll turn the lights way down low/ maybe we won't watch the show!" LOVE IT.

Tommy James and the Shondells. These guys wrote "Crimson and Clover," which just so happens to be, in my expert opinion, one of the most awesomely arcane psychedelic songs ever. It would be totally possible for me to listen to that song on repeat forever and still love it. Not only that, they also wrote the audaciously catchy "Moni Moni" which even people raised by wolves have heard and the restrained groove "Crystal Blue Persuasion." I also adore "Sweet Cherry Wine" but my very favorite is the garage-y "Hanky Panky." But then, I love anything that sounds cute and filthy. I missed my calling as their go-go dancer.

The Four Tops. If you think you are too cool to drive around belting out your mom's Motown, you suck at life and should quit. The Four Tops pretty much wrote every awesome song that isn't by the Temps. "I Can't Help Myself (Sugar Pie, Honey Bunch)" is so catchy it makes my teeth hurt. So is the fabulous "Same Old Song" and the bitchin', motivational "I'll Be the There." I know you sing the back up parts and drum on your steering wheel, don't lie to me. Plus, they get major credit for taking on the daunting task of writing a song about a girl named Bernadette. It gets pretty philosophical too, "While I live only to hold you/ some other men they long to control you/ but how can they control you, Bernadette/ when they cannot control themselves, Bernadette/ from wanting you, needing you?" Wow, if someone wrote me a song like that, it might almost make up for my name being Bernadette.

scamtastic

I just got the following text:

fr: UNKNOWN

Hey, I got your number from a friend of mine, but I bet you can't guess who I am! My username's cute_tease, if you wanna come see if you recognize me online at cute_tease.match-pit.org. Well, hope to see you soon!

12:35PM Tues, Jun10



Seriously, I don't know anyone who uses the word "wanna." Sadly, that IS was the first thing that came to mind. To be fair, however, I was impressed by the comma after "hey." I'm also pretty confident that no dudes I know, nor any I would like to know, would call themselves a "cute tease."
Spammers, you need to take it up a notch.

thoughts on Iron Man

I can wholeheartedly say that Iron Man was all the awesomeness I hoped for and more.
My only criticism was that they didn't rock Black Sabbath the whole time. In fact, I think they really could've taken all the music up to eleven. Other than that, however, the smartassedness was delicious and that has got to be the finest damn goatee I have ever spied. The Marvel inside jokes were also pretty great (although the "blue and gold spandex" line in Xmen was probably the best) especially the S.H.I.E.L.D. gag which so perfectly set up the bonus clip with Samuel L Jackson as Nick Fury. I was actually so excited I sat up in my front row seat and shrieked, "Nick Fury is black?!?!? AWE-SOME!!!!" I've never been this excited by anything relating to the Avengers.
Wow. I am such I nerd.