But never fear, blagoweb, I stole an idea from my bestie Meg and will now unleash years worth of really bad internet dating missives that are very old, but so very outrageous I saved them for this moment.
Behold!
I'm skipping the myriad of "hey, hi, let's chat." Let's try a sampling of pithy, but weird:
Wink
Anyone ever tell you kinda resemble Bjork and Sandra Bullock? Anyhow, just thought I'd say hi. ;)
Combined? Is that even a compliment?
Wow
you spend alot of time thinking! I do too and I think we would get along well.
Um. Wow. So your friends spend a lot of time... passed out? slamming their hands in doors? afflicted with a neurological disorder?
Eye of Newt
So what does one find in a witches fridge besides wool of bat and tongue of dog.
Apparently not apostrophes to denote possession.
Interesting match
I have to run into work and do some stuff, but send me a message when you get this and I'll reply when I can.
What is going on here? This guy is either totally unhinged or groping at brilliance. Is he trying to gaslight me into think I know him, or somehow am forgetting the step when he INTRODUCED himself and started the conversation? Does he not differentiate between written, spoken, and text messaging forms of social interaction? Maybe he doesn't even differentiate units of time like present and future which prevents him from understanding that he can write ME a complete message when he gets done with work, later.
(no subject)
oh no you're one of THOSE types of girls lol
Oh, no. You're one of those types of boys who can only get people's attention by trying to goad them into being annoyed by your vague insults which you will promptly admit were merely a "conversation starter."
Stay tuned for some from the "Ewww, gross!" category and "holy crap, do you not know how to read?"
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