Friday, November 30, 2007

Queen of Hearts


Devotees of the tarocchi,

The other day I appeared not once, but twice, as the Queen of Cups (in a conventional playing deck, and more tellingly, the Queen of Hearts) as the first card in a Celtic Cross spread with two different decks.

I, of course, am always the Queen of Rods. Redheaded, fire-signed, sunny, capricious, creative, ebullient, exuberant, sharp-tongued, loyal, opinionated, passionate, impatient, ambitious, confident, and suchlike. Sounds about right, no? The Queen of Cups: sentimental, nurturing, romantic, empathetic, intuitive, loving, affectionate, shy. My first reaction was, "That isn't me!" but, then, the damn question was about me.

What does it mean to be described as something else entirely to a querent? Certainly not that I am NOT the Rods type, I think. That I am the queen of cups right now? To that person? What is it to be something you do not identify yourself to be FOR/TO someone else anyway? To me that sounds disingenuous at best and terrifying at worst. But I suppose the more sentimental among us consider that to be romance. And who is active agent is that perception? Am I the one being different, or is the subject that is seeing me differently than I see myself?

I imagine in a spread for another person, the latter is most likely the case. Which is not to say that a person's first impression is wrong. Just, judging from my incredulity, not the primary or my preferred iteration of my personality. So what is that about? Am I completely mental to have some kind of ranking for qualities which I feel are more important or most salient? And how is it that I ended up preferring to be described as impetuous before comforting?

Hmm. Mysteries of the universe. :P

No comments: